Tuesday, October 19, 2004

That time of year
she says wake up it's no use pretending
eyes wide open, naked as we came
one will spread our ashes round the yard

I thought that maybe typing in colour would be kind of hip, but I decided against it: it ruins my image... or something.

I was so proud of myself, I actually finished my lab report on time yesterday, and I got a lot of work done on art today, plus it looks pretty good so far. So it's satisfying overall. But I'm feeling kind of weird lately, I'm wondering if I'm going to get like this every autumn. I've got some flab or something that needs to be killed, so I'll start working out and maybe it'll kill two birds with one stone.

Hmm... I decidedly listen to mostly depressing music. Speaking of which, I had an interesting conversation with my mother the other day in the kitchen about how we're both attracted to sad things. I wonder if it was her depression that first made me this way. It brings up unpleasant memories.

It's always interesting to see how your thoughts can change over the course of two hours. Your emotions, your thoughts, your scenery.

It seems like right now is a time of high-ish energy, where I'm getting a lot done, but also like I'm not really valuing the time? Maybe that's not it, it's difficult to place my finger on, I'm too eclectic and explosive to concentrate on anything long enough to completely enjoy it.

days before you came
it always seemed enticing to be naked at the bay
days before you came